Uncertainty

I have been feeling very tired today. Lately, I have been think a lot of the uncertainty of my future. My dear uncles are waiting to see me be a failure and come crawling back to them. They hate the thought of me having ambitions. I tried to take my mind of them and my worries by playing computer games. I just discovered IGoogle this week (I am probably couple of months late!) and I added some free games they had to my own personal website. My personal fav was Trapped even though it was a very short game. I can even add my GMail and Yahoo Mail on the site. Plus Garfield and my Libra daily horoscope, made me happy with IGoogle.

I have been filling some scholarship forms again lately but I feel most of them are quite a long shot so late in the year right now for the coming college term. I have been filling them half heartedly without hope but I keep on it as a sense of responsibility to myself.

I am a stubborn gal who is not prepared to give up on her dreams, not yet. Despite how far fetched those dreams seem right now and despite the fact that people around me from the day my dad died kept telling me to come back to reality and not to have ambitions.

I am really very tired lately. You can even hear me yawning right now. It is probably the feeling of hopelessness that keeps on enveloping me lately and the tiredness of worrying what will happen to me in the future. Uncertainty is a terrible feeling.